Testimony of The Month

"Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ. From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work."
Ephesians 4:15-16

Testimony of The Month

As I reflect back on my life, although I knew who Jesus was my whole life, I don’t feel like I ever had a personal, intimate, and real relationship with Him until the summer after my sophomore year of college.

In high school I got into a bad cycle of making really poor choices, feeling guilty about them, and then going back out and making the same mistakes over and over. Looking back I realize my identity and worth was not placed in Christ but in what others thought of me, said of me, how they viewed and labeled me.

My freshman year of college the cycle of bad choices and mistakes continued as did the fact that I placed my identity and worth in what others thought of me. Because of both of these things I found myself in a place of loneliness, confusion, and I honestly just felt lost. I didn’t know who I was, who I was going to be, or why everything that was happening, was happening. That Spring I went on my first sports ministry trip to Brazil. It was awesome! We spent a lot of time playing soccer, worshiping the Lord, sharing the Gospel, and serving alongside local churches. At the end of the trip, I remember one of trip leaders sharing a message about who God was and the hope that was found in Him. Through everything, I knew God was still there for me, waiting for me to turn to him. I knew there was hope. That night on the beach in Rio I rededicated my life to Christ and I made a promise to both God and myself that I’ve held true to, by the strength of the Lord, to this day.

But after the trip the “spiritual high” slowly wore off and I found myself feeling the same as before. I was making better choices and living a better life but I still felt lost and confused. The summer of 2012 I decided to move out to Chicago and play for the Chicago Eagles. God used this summer to transform my life. I will always look back and remember my first summer with the Eagles and I will always be able to point to the moment when God totally transformed my heart. We had a devotional one night given by two players about identity. It was that night that the Lord freed me from the sin, heartache, and confusion that entangled me. He spoke so clearly to me, I was CHOSEN by HIM. I was HIS daughter. I was LOVED by the King of Kings. The One True God wanted ME…that summer God became real and that summer the power of prayer became real. God used that summer to forever change the rest of my life. I was a new creation, the old was gone and the new had come. I was a daughter of the One True King and regardless of what life or the enemy tried to throw at me, I would remain rooted in Him.

The following summer I was baptized in Chicago as an outward expression of my inward decision to surrender my life to Jesus Christ and receive new life in Him. He is the only one that fully satisfies, He is the only one that fully fills us, and He is the only source of true and lasting love and joy.

Life was great, not because every day was easy but because every day I was strengthened, renewed, and filled with the Holy Spirit. However, the enemy is real and he loves to deceive us. A verse I always cling to is 1 Peter 5:8-9 “Be alert and of sober mind, your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kinds of suffering.” However, I learned after college that sometimes things that look and seem good are not of God and essentially, not good. I learned that the enemy can use what looks good to deceive us if we are not careful and that it is easy, if we lose focus, to be deceived. We need to have discernment so that we are not fooled which is why it is important to stay rooted and established in the Word of God and to be alert and of sober mind.

I got involved in a relationship that seemed good and seemed like God brought us together. It wasn’t long before I knew, in my heart, this relationship was not of God. However, I tried to make myself believe it was fine and that things weren’t that bad. I was constantly telling myself that he was trying and that he wanted to be a man of God. I tried to convince myself that things would get better, that I would be able to trust him someday, that I was the reason for all the problems and arguments. However, I was at a point where I was questioning myself and my worth and I just accepted that this pain and belittlement was the “norm” for relationships. I was willing to settle for something way less than God’s best for me because I believed this to be a “serious relationship” and in the eyes of the world, it was normal to feel this way in a relationship.

I’m so thankful that the Lord saved me from my own self and ended this destructive relationship. At the time I was so confused and felt lost and lonely as bad as things were I didn’t want to be back to square one in my love life. It didn’t take long for me to recognize how far from God I had drifted. I knew I needed to get back into the Word, to focus my heart and mind on my King, and I knew I needed to be free from worldly distractions. I was able to learn a lot from this relationship (it’s funny how the Lord can use everything for our good). I had a very Godly woman in my life at the time who became a true mentor for me and really helped shed light on the importance of having a true, Spirit filled man to spend my life with and she reminded me to not waste my time on dating men who would never be a Godly husband.

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him who have been called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28. God is faithful. When we are truly obedient, seek Him, and wait on Him he pours out His blessings on us. His timing is so perfect. Never late, never early, just perfect. Of this I am confident.

It wasn’t until I focused my heart, mind, and soul on Him and Him alone and put my full trust in my Creator that I ended up at my dream job and with an amazing man of God. Now, where I am, I’m so thankful that I trusted God and His timing and didn’t allow myself to settle for a career that wasn’t the best God had for me or for a man who wasn’t the best God had for me.

I know as a young, single woman (or man) it can be challenging wondering if you’ll ever find the right person, it can be easy to allow yourself to settle but let me tell you, it is worth the wait! The man (or woman) God has for you will far exceed your expectations and make you a better person and stronger in your faith. Don’t be afraid to wait for God’s timing because it is PERFECT and our God is always faithful.

I wanted to share a couple of songs that the Lord has really spoken to me through.They have been good reminders that I am free from my old life and those chains are broken. They remind me that everything I've been through the Lord has used to teach and direct me.

Break Every Chain
Jesus Culture

Great Things
Elevation Worship

Comments 1

  1. What an amazing awesome Father we have!!! I just recently had to have cardiac arrest due to a sudden heart attack. Still taking everything in….and finding out in time that there were more good things that God brought out of this for me…and for others 😉💕. Maybe I could share more down the road. But needed to share what God’s done for me…brought me back to life.
    PS your page is verry inspiring and filling my soul 😉. I thank God for leading you to do this. Be blessed and multiply by His favor in your life 💕💕

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